How to Answer the Question “Am I Depressed?”

First of all, let me acknowledge that this is a complicated topic that does not allow for a simple answer. This post is not intended to be a comprehensive view of depression. Rather, I want to suggest a few things to consider if you find yourself grappling with the question, “Am I depressed?” In particular, I want to offer a Jungian perspective on this question, which I believe provides a needed corrective to some of the contemporary views that our culture holds about depression.

Finding the Right Language

My father-in-law is a wonderful, outgoing, and energetic man. He is in his nineties, but still full of what he would call, “vim and vigor.” But some days he just doesn’t feel like himself. All he wants to do is lie in his hammock and read the paper. 

Now, from my perspective that sounds like an afternoon of bliss. From his perspective, however, he is “depressed.” While it makes sense to me that a 90 year old man would need to slow down from time to time, to my father-in-law, to be tired is to be depressed. 

But the problem is not whether my father-in-law is depressed. The problem is that he doesn’t have adequate language to describe his experience. Tired equals depressed. 

The word ‘depression’ has come to stand in for so many experiences these days and the result is that we no longer know how to differentiate depression from merely being down in the dumps.

One of the contributions of Jungian psychology is its understanding that the experience of meaning is, in itself, healing. According to Jung:

 “Meaninglessness inhibits fullness of life and is therefore equivalent to illness. Meaning makes a great many things endurable–perhaps everything.”

The Jungian Analyst James Hillman, using the word ‘soul’ in place of meaning, describes the vital importance of finding the kind of language that will lead to an experience of healing:

“What a miracle it is to find the right words, words that carry soul accurately, where thought, image, and feeling interweave. Then we realize that soul can be made on the spot simply through speech.”

If meaning begins with finding the right words, instead of asking “Am I depressed?” you might start with a more basic question like “Am I tired?” or “Am I sad?” When we hear the word ‘depression’ today, we hear it as a thing, something fixed and immovable. But our emotional experiences are not things, but events that move us, flow through us, flow on. 

As soon as you start to expand the language with which you speak of your experience, life begins to take on new dimensions and even what you thought of, perhaps fearfully, as ‘depression’ seems to reveal variation and color: a barrage of the blues, a mantle of melancholy, a gathering of grief. These are not illnesses, but moments of life. Difficult, yes, but able to be lived through.

Telling the Right Story

In her article, The Antidepressant Generation, written for the New York Times’ Well blog, Doris Iarovici writes about a college student whom she was treating for depression and her own conflict over treating her condition with medication.

“My patient’s symptoms were only one part of a compelling life story: that of a young woman trying to balance personal aspirations with intimacy. She was discounting her emotional reactions to difficult life events. These struggles might be the very moments that precipitate personal growth.”

Iarovici highlights a very important aspect of depression, which is the relationship of the individual to the rest of her life. Instead of trying to understand how to weave our emotional lives into the fabric of our overall life narrative, we have chosen as a culture to try to make uncomfortable experiences simply go away. As Iarovici notes:

 “We walk a thinning line between diagnosing illness and teaching our youth to view any emotional upset as pathological.”

What does it mean to be a human being? What is the normal course of a human life and what role does suffering play in that life? These are the kinds of questions that help us develop stories about life–the function once played by the living mythologies of the world–that help us makes sense of our lives and the circumstances of those lives.

[optin title=”Discover Your Calling: Sign up today for my free 10-day email course.” text=”Learn how to cultivate a ‘calling mindset’ and discover the work that you were meant to do.” buttontext=”Get Access Today” successMessage=”Message has been submitted successfully.” errorMessage=”Failed to send your message. Please try later.” invalidEmailMessage=”Your email address does not appear valid.” image=”https://www.jungiantherapist.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/wpid-Discover-Your-Calling-Logo4.jpg” border=”true” collectfirstname=”true” collectlastname=”false” collectphone=”false” collectcompany=”false”]

Am I Depressed? or Am I Growing?

The contemporary story about depression is a medical story: Depression is an illness. It is something that should not be. It is, therefore, something that should be eliminated. 

Jean Raffa, in her post The Positive Side of Depression, does a nice job of articulating the Jungian story about depression, in which it is understood as the precursor of new psychological growth. Raffa quotes the Jungian Analyst M. Esther Harding’s description of the dynamics associated with a sudden loss of motivation and energy:

“One phase of life has come to an end, and that which is needed for the new is not immediately at hand. This withdrawal [of psychic energy] will be experienced in consciousness as a feeling of emptiness, often of depression, and certainly of inertia, with an overtone of self-rebuke.”

Understanding that what seems negative may be part of your future growth makes it easier to bear and gives a person a way to move forward. Raffa explains it this way:

“We need to remember that when our libido, or psychological energy, withdraws, it is not gone forever. The laws of physics tell us that energy can be transformed but not destroyed. When we feel a loss of energy it simply means that the energy which was formerly available to our ego has sunk into the unconscious. “

The way to work through the loss of our usual energy is with a process of “creative introversion”:

“Creative introversion means working with our fantasies and dreams in creative ways that feel meaningful. These products of our unconscious speak to the hidden forces which have sucked our libido down into the dark belly of the whale, and their images can give us clues not only to the nature of the difficulty, but also to the solution.”

Viewed from the point of view of this alternative Jungian story about the meaning of depression, the rush to simply eliminate sadness and discomfort from our lives is premature and potentially damaging to the soul. Jung calls it an amputation:  

“A neurosis is by no means merely a negative thing, it is also something positive…In reality the neurosis contains the patient’s psyche, or at least an essential part of it; and if…the neurosis could be plucked from him like a bad tooth, he would have gained nothing but would have lost something very essential to him…life loses its point and hence its meaning. This would not be a cure, it would be a regular amputation.” (A neurosis is a psychological crisis of which depression is one form. Emphasis mine.)

Trauma and Depression

It is important, of course, to acknowledge that even if a depression is in the service of some future personal growth, that does not mean that it is a pleasant or easy experience. It is tempting, sometimes, to look beyond the darkness to the light. However, well-meaning encouragements like “It’s always darkest before the dawn” are rarely very comforting to the individual struggling with the dark night. 

This is especially true if you have ever experienced any trauma in your life. Periods of depression then can seem deeper, darker, and harder to work through. 

Some psychoanalytic writers distinguish between what they call ‘benign’ and ‘malignant’ forms of depression. The more benign forms are those that I have been discussing up to now–times when life seems to dry up, but which ultimately lead to a new and renewed experience of living. 

The malignant forms are often connected in some way to an earlier trauma. These are truly “dark nights of the soul.” They are those kinds of depressions where all hope seems gone. Nothing seems to help you shake off your sadness. Maybe you can’t even feel good enough to feel sad. 

In the depths of these experiences you may feel a sense of hopelessness and even have suicidal thoughts. If this is the case, a time of stabilization is needed and it is essential to seek treatment immediately. 

Yet, even these bleak experiences can be understood in terms of the Jungian story of the growth of the individual. As Dr. Andy Drymalski points out in his excellent article, Growing Through Depression:

“Jungian psychology interprets suicide as a literal enactment of what is meant to be a symbolic process. It is not the body that is meant to die, but an unhelpful standpoint of the ego.”

The question at this stage is no longer “Am I depressed?” That is no longer in doubt. A more effective question for this experience would be “How can I be and feel more fully allive?” Drymalksi suggests some other questions to consider:

Rather than contemplating suicide, depressed persons can often benefit from asking themselves the following questions: What attitudes or goals need to change, or be let go of, in my life? In what ways is my current identity or approach to life at odds with my deeper nature/calling? What is the role of (symbolic) death in my life at this time?

Depression and Therapy

If you are asking yourself, “Am I depressed?”, you are obviously in the middle of an experience that is challenging you in ways that you have not encountered before. Or perhaps you encounter them far too often. In this post, I have tried to offer several ways to consider, and possibly answer, that question for yourself. 

Sometimes, however, it is necessary to have someone with whom you can explore your feelings and experiences, someone who can help you get out of your own head, gain some objectivity and give you emotional support through a difficult time. You may want to consider working with a therapist to help you make sense of what you are going through right now. And if you want to go a little deeper and turn this troubling time into an opportunity for new growth and a new chance to thrive, you may find a Jungian approach to psychotherapy particularly meaningful. 

Depression is very serious and should be taken very seriously. I would argue that the Jungian approach of trying to understand the meaning that depression might have for the individual suffering with it is, in fact, taking depression more seriously than one that merely tries to eliminate it. 

It can certainly be a more challenging approach and it is one that definitely goes against the grain of a culture that only wants to “accentuate the positive.” But for many people, the potential for personal renewal makes it worth the challenges.

Want to see if Jungian Therapy is for you?
Try a Free 20-minute mini session

Let’s meet via Skype or Google Hangout and see if working with me is the right fit for you at this time.

[maxbutton id=”1″]